Post by Kender on Jan 15, 2006 20:09:58 GMT -5
well here is what has been going on. i had a major falling out with Scud. He has cut me from his life like mold on a sheet of bread. How should i feel about this? He was one of my Best friends but the question is... did i ever really know him? I'm starting to think i never did. i believe i was deceived from the start...that or he has changed not for the better. i know i am not the only one who thinks this. well anyways i moved out in a half attempt to save any sort of friendship i had with him... well it failed. who knows what sort of things he says about me now. I'm not sure i even care...he never really stood up for me anyways. the more i think about it the less he seemed like a friend...the more i was like a tool to him. such a familiar thing to me.
Andy and i broke up. I'm not sure if i mentioned that. what i didn't mention was that Scud was the puppeteer in the whole thing. He was the one behind the curtain pulling Andy's strings. This last time Scud made me out to be a not so friendly person...that i am always looking for someone better. That i have been sleeping with someone behind Andy's back. This all came from my so called Best friend. *sigh* the guy who "lives" by the code of the Knights. what bullshit! He certainly had me fooled.
i was honest with him from day one. i hid nothing. i told him how i felt about him and he shared those said feelings. please note: contrary to what he says to people, he and i never dated, we hung out with a group of friends. maybe its just me, but in my mind a date our a mutually planned event involving dinner and a movie or something. not sitting at a Denny's with 5 other people or in an apartment drinking again with 5 other people. call me old fashion or something.
Also i have written prof that he shared my feelings. I Copy and Paste anything meaningful emailed to me in my private Greatest journal. This obviously doesn't count all the verbal times he said it to me.
"...Before I said I would never say it to your face, now I utter them for the last in text -
I love you. Now go find whatever the hell it is you're looking for, cause it wasn't me. And when you tire and need to rest your head upon my shoulder, it will have a place for you, and I will be there to hold you and tell you everything is ok..." June 19, 2005
anyways now that all that has been said i shall move on. i moved out. i tried out a job at a doctors office... it fell through after one day. A pity i guess.
I got a puppy named Leia. [as in Star wars "Princess Leia"] Her paper work says shes a pit bull but shes much too small for be a pit.
She could be a Beagle
Other than all that stuff Ive been kinda depressed and stressed. I'm worried about bills, I'm worried about my life in general...my circle of friends have grown even smaller...but all good things must end right? f*ck friends! what good are they other than to f*ck you over? {granted this excludes a couple of my said friends}
Andy and i broke up. I'm not sure if i mentioned that. what i didn't mention was that Scud was the puppeteer in the whole thing. He was the one behind the curtain pulling Andy's strings. This last time Scud made me out to be a not so friendly person...that i am always looking for someone better. That i have been sleeping with someone behind Andy's back. This all came from my so called Best friend. *sigh* the guy who "lives" by the code of the Knights. what bullshit! He certainly had me fooled.
i was honest with him from day one. i hid nothing. i told him how i felt about him and he shared those said feelings. please note: contrary to what he says to people, he and i never dated, we hung out with a group of friends. maybe its just me, but in my mind a date
Also i have written prof that he shared my feelings. I Copy and Paste anything meaningful emailed to me in my private Greatest journal. This obviously doesn't count all the verbal times he said it to me.
"...Before I said I would never say it to your face, now I utter them for the last in text -
I love you. Now go find whatever the hell it is you're looking for, cause it wasn't me. And when you tire and need to rest your head upon my shoulder, it will have a place for you, and I will be there to hold you and tell you everything is ok..." June 19, 2005
anyways now that all that has been said i shall move on. i moved out. i tried out a job at a doctors office... it fell through after one day. A pity i guess.
I got a puppy named Leia. [as in Star wars "Princess Leia"] Her paper work says shes a pit bull but shes much too small for be a pit.
She could be a Beagle
Other than all that stuff Ive been kinda depressed and stressed. I'm worried about bills, I'm worried about my life in general...my circle of friends have grown even smaller...but all good things must end right? f*ck friends! what good are they other than to f*ck you over? {granted this excludes a couple of my said friends}